Faith and Fear

This is the first blog post for our website, and it’s interesting to try and figure out what it should be about. Since I’ll be writing most of these for the time being, I think I’ll write about what I’m going through.

I’ve basically been in my new position at Marannook for about a month. Thankfully, the initial shock has worn off, but there is still so much to do. I continue to look at my ‘to-do’ list and realize that I can’t do all of this on my own. There have been many moments of ‘fear’ where I’ve wondered if I made a good decision. I love the ministry of Marannook, and I love discipling college students and teaching children about GOD’s amazing Word, but did I just take on too much? In some ways, the answer is yes, but in others the answer is no. I know that this ministry has been sustained by GOD for these 40 years. I know that there have been tons of staff that have come through here, and I know that all of them have sin, so that means that GOD has worked all this time in spite of having a ton of sinful people.

The reality is this. GOD does amazing work even when we are weak, and it seems that HE even does HIS best work when we are the weakest. HE loves to take broken people and use them for HIS glory, and that’s exactly the point. HE gets the glory. Even though my fear is a bad thing, it is often used by GOD to lead me to faith. I can’t stay in fear mode, but my fear causes me to cry out to HIM for help, which is exactly what HE wants. He wants us to trust HIM, and our faith grows the most when we know we need HIM the most. It’s such an interesting dichotomy. I know that my fear is really sin, but it has been pushing me to go back to HIM and watch HIM work in situations I know I can’t do on my own.

For the first time in my life, I think I am really in a situation that I know I can’t pull off on my own. It’s just too big. Sure I can plan and prepare, but I know there is so much more to what GOD does at Marannook. People’s lives are radically changed every summer! Campers hear the Word taught clearly, sometimes for the first time in their lives. Counselors study the Word in such depth that it changes how they view GOD, the world, and themselves. I can’t do any of that, and yet, I can take rest in that reality. I can’t do any of that, but HE can and will. HE promises that HIS Word will change people. My fear of weakness and failure leads me to trust the ONE that will never fail and that brings great comfort. If I stay in my fear, I will fail, but if I let my fear lead me to faith, I’ll grow as HE succeeds.

To GOD be the glory for the great things HE will do,